Country Living

Wouldn't that be neat if this were actually an article that I'm submitting to their magazine? It's not, of course.

I thought my mini vacation was perfect, I ate a lot, slept a lot and found a number of people, i.e. all of L.A. who would qualify for What Not to Wear.

The other night the girls were asking for stories from my childhood, that is farther away than I think it should be. A lot of the retelling came from when our family moved to 'the country'. I put together a little sample of how you know if you live in the country.

You know you live in the country if:

• you call the nearest largely populated area 'town'.


• you 'rent' movies from your neighbors.


• you can get a horse by working for it.


• the only cell phone reception is by a flagpole, in the parking lot, of the high school.


• prayer is said before each school event.


• there are four generations of a family still living there and you call the oldest one grandma and grandpa.


• directions sound something like this: if you take this road, that has the big haystack, and you turn in after the first dairy, but before the second dairy, right where the line of mailboxes are and you see a fence, that's us.


• you go swimming in your neighbor's milk tank. It had water, not milk, by the way.


• there is all day kindergarten because there's not enough time, money, or people to have the buses leave and come back again half way through the day.


• you're related to someone. Seriously, you can move to a town and not know a soul and within minutes, you've realized you're related.


• there's a row of churches.


• they have a 'parade' on Homecoming through the 'town'.


• one of the bars has the best hamburgers, ever.


• some stores are only open certain hours on certain days, or whatever they feel like doing.


• people know what corn topping, mud bogging, canal swimming, and speeding are.


• someone is driving really slowly, it's a farmer checking out the fields or an illegal.


• your sister and you just move there and you decide to go on a bike ride, and realize your destination is farther than you thought, but you keep going, and on the way home, your sister gets a flat tire and you're still miles from your home, on a deserted road. Oh yes, and you forgot to tell your mom.


• there are rodents shot with a BB gun hanging on fence posts.


• your dog may or may not tree a raccoon up the electric pole in your front yard.


• a block party encompasses a five mile radius.


• most people learn how to drive a tractor and walk all in the same week.


• people leave their car running with the keys in it while they run into the convenience store.


• trucks are called rigs.


• you think one of the best things is to slide down a huge row of manure that's been wrapped in plastic.

Till next week,

Katie

Once Again...

I am going to do a thankful post. I've been on the verge of tears every.single.day this week and I am hoping that this will be a good remedy.

I am thankful for:

• a husband that pays the bills, literally. I didn't realize what a pain in the bum that was.


• that Meg still likes to hold my hand, even though she can walk just fine without me.


• bedtime. I assume that I don't need to explain that one.


• chocolate. Will I be twenty pounds heavier when most of you see me again? Yes, yes I will be. Do I care, not a lick.


• cable/dish/directTV. We've personally never purchased any of these, and after a couple of weeks of having one of them, we will ne-ve-r purchase them. I am a self-aware person and I know what makes me a bad mom: reading a good book, HGTV, and going grocery shopping with three kids.


• the nation wide phenomena of garage selling. I take comfort in knowing that wherever I go, other people will have junk that they are trying to sell for more than it's worth.


• that Adeline is still Adeline and that she can throw an Adeline fit, regardless of her circumstances. If you can't be good at something, at least be consistent.


• for Elizabeth's ability to be happy wherever she is and that I never have to worry about her making friends, even if it is at three different schools in one year.

Katie

Life news: I had no luck on Friday when I went house hunting and was, honestly, very disappointed. I was naively optimistic.

Blog news: Today's post will be it for the week. I am heading back down to Medford on Wednesday to look for houses again and then I'll be in California visiting my lover on Friday.

If I post next week - I have a lot going on, please don't judge or count me as fickle - it'll be only once and it will be Wednesday.

About your blogs: if I don't comment over the next couple of months, be understanding. My in-law's computer, for whatever reason, won't allow me to access some of the blogs.

Liz, thanks for participating in the cooking show tittle challenge. My vote is for Servin' up Sunshine.

Upon Reflection

A couple of insignificant things that I have an opinion about:

• Music artists as T.V. actors: I personally feel that some perfectly qualified and talented T.V. actor is jobless because a perfectly good music artist who is unqualified and talentless is given the job instead. To all producers out there: just because they are famous, doesn't mean they'll help your ratings.


• Rachel Barry: I know that's not her real name, but I have no idea what it is. She's one of the main characters on Glee. I love Glee and I'm so glad that it's back on. However, her bangs look awful.


• I think I could start a cooking show. Am I the greatest cook, no. But in all reality, no one but me, the cook, actually tries the food. I am fairly good at talking to an unresponsive/non-existent audience. Case in point, ordering food from the drive-thru at a fast food chain. You can't argue that's not similar. I am also capable of trying to be funny but no one is laughing - another similarity. You're welcome to leave suggestions of possible titles for my cooking show. I also work for Harry and David. Guilty by association sorta speak.


• Little Cesar's: having fake red, orange, and red flowers - the same color scheme as your pizza boxes - in hanging baskets outside your 'restaurant' does not make anyone more inclined to buy pizza from you.


• Jennifer Aniston: she'll never be an award-winning actress, so stop trying to help her become one buy casting her in mediocre movies with unknown male leads.

In blog news, I won't be posting for the next couple of Fridays. I have a couple of things going on like......house hunting! (and other things like flying down to visit Bryce)

Cheers,

Katie

A Series of Letters

Dear Mickey Mouse Clubhouse,

I don't find your hot dog song the least bit annoying.

Dear In-Laws,

When you get home from your week long vacation, you will notice a pile of clean dishes on your counter. I do know how to put dishes away, I just have no idea where those ones go. I thought it would be easier for you to put them away then for you to try and find them after I've put them away.

Dear Rain,

I need you to go away for a while. All you make me want to do is lie in bed and read. Which would be fine, three kids ago.

Dear Architectural Salvage Yard in Eugene,

I know it's been years, but I haven't forgotten about you. I plan to visit as soon as I can. Never mind that I don't have a house yet to decorate.

Dear fabulous real estate agent in Medford whom I haven't met yet, but whom I hope exists,

Please find me the house of my dreams quickly.

Dear Meg's zipper pajamas,

Your job is stay on Meg so she doesn't wake up in the morning naked. Your job is not to amuse Meg at night time by letting her take you off so she doesn't go to sleep.

Dear Bryce,

I miss you a lot. More than I'm going to say right now so that I don't embarrass you in front of my friends. I miss you helping me find my shoes when I've misplaced them.

Dear Eugene School District,

2 1/2 hours of kindergarten is lousy, please make appropriate adjustments.

Dear house in A-town,

I miss you as only a girl can miss her first house.

Dear Hobby Lobby,

Please carefully consider my request for you to move to Medford. I will make it worth your while.

Dear Friends in A-town,

Thank you for being friends worth missing, because I do, a lot.

Dear garage sale,

Thank you for having a vintage, filthy, I'm-not-even-sure-if-it-works type writer that I could buy for $5.

Kind regards,

Katie

The Big News

Harry and David are being featured on Oprah today because they're helping the ladies at Centerville Pie Co. dreams come true.

Anyway, as part of my job, I got to do some mock posts to put on the Oprah, the Harry and David, and the Centerville Pie Co. Facebook pages. It's Oprah, no matter how you feel about her, you can't deny she's an icon.

If you're interested, not that I'm getting paid for this, you can head over to http://www.facebook.com/harryanddavid as of now to enter to be one of the people that wins one of their pies. They're giving away a pie every hour for seven days. When you do enter, the stuff that you see is most of what I put together.

Thanks for looking. I'm assuming you all are going to, even though I know it's not true.

Katie

The 411

This is an update post for those of you who care about the nitty gritty of my life right now, and an you-can-skip-this-post for those of you who don't care. I'll, for one, never know the difference.

The girls and I are currently staying in Eugene with Bryce's parents. We were unable to find a rental down in Medford for whatever reason. We'll chalk it up to divine intervention. Bryce is down in California training for eight weeks for his new position as an IRS agent. All of our 'stuff' is in a storage unit. I plan on going down to Medford once a week for however long it takes to find a house. We're hopeful because the housing market down there has been hit pretty hard and the fall/winter months are a good time to buy.

We will close on our house in Colorado the 24th of this month. The first people to look at our house made an offer on it. Definitely a blessing.

The drive over was fine, thank goodness.

The kids are adjusting fine, well Elizabeth and Meg are. Adeline has been acting out a lot and I hope that Bryce's good-bye was meaningful to her because he may not see her again. That kid....

One last thing, I got a job with Harry and David. They're located in Medford and sell fruit, gift baskets, gourmet popcorn, etc. It's temporary, just till December. Want to know what I do? I put together their posts for Facebook and Twitter. It's really fun. Isn't it interesting that a job like this five years ago didn't even exist? I got the job because one of the guys in their marketing department reads my blog and he feels 'I have a talent for writing'. If you check back later, I'll be doing another post about my job.

I apologize if this post isn't the most riveting. I'm really tired. Taking care of three kids, by yourself, in someone else's house, in a town that you're not familiar with, where the kindergartners only have school for 2 1/2 hours (what!?), is exhausting.

One last piece of business: have you read The Hunger Games? It's really good. Just make sure that when you start it you're on a deserted island all by yourself where you don't have any obligations besides your own survival.

Katie

Reason #5,682

The subject that I am about to broach may polarize my readers. However, I am ready to take that risk. I feel like a wise veteran after approximately 7.5 months of blogging. I feel that you will be sympathetic and forgiving if this does not go as planned.

Put the toilet seat down.

I could name countless reasons: it's un-sanitary, un-safe, expensive if anything of size is 'accidentally' flushed down the dark abyss, dirty, and un-American.

I could use the same argument for putting the toilet seat down as the great philosophers of our world have used for the existence of God. Can you prove that God does not exist? Can you prove that it is better to keep the toilet seat up?

I think not.

Reason #5,682 to put the toilet seat down: your one year old may or may not be so impressed with the novelty of little paper cups in the bathroom at her grandma's house that she will be able to devise her own ways of getting water with which the cup was intended and head straight for the toilet with, you guessed it, the toilet seat up. Your one year old will of course have you right there in the bathroom with her and as you turn away for a time that is less than a split second, she has dunked cup, hand, and arm into a toilet bowl full of water that is slightly tinted yellow.

You will say "Si-ck!" as you mop up the mess. To which your three year old will ask if your one year old is sick. And you, never allowing to let a parenting moment slip by, will reply by saying, yes, yes, she is sick, so don't you ever drink water out of the toilet either.

Hoping you have a better way of building up your children's immune systems, and if you have a similar experience, not that I'm wishing that on anyone, feel free to join the conversation with a comment,

Katie