Apparently, I’m highly motivated by guilt,

and a delusion that I’m more popular and interesting than I really am.

I received this from my sister the other day:

“So I have been stalking your blog about a week now because my life is so mundane that I have to derive entertainment out of your daily activities. And do you know how disappointing it is to see that the occurrence of new updates have been far and few in between. I know you have a busy life with like 6 kids...just joking, 5 kids...and a husband, but come on. Please just update like every other day - I don' think that is too much to ask.
Your loving sister”

So, here I am.

Writing a blog post.

For a sister.

Who could call.

Anytime.

Any.time.

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The past few weeks have been a KHP {Katie Humbling Project}.

I was getting super kind of tired of the endless:

floors to sweep,

dishes to wash,

meals to prepare,

kids to bathe,

chickens to feed,

phone calls to make,

toys to pick up,

books to read,

furniture to dust,

beds to make,

laundry to sort, wash, and then fold,

diapers to change,

arguments to resolve,

Elizabeth informing me my rolls weren’t homemade because I had used the bread machine to make the dough,

{Are you kidding me right now?  I went out, into my backyard, to the chicken coop, that Bryce and I built, with our bare hands, and got a free-range egg, from a chicken I raised in my kitchen, ohmygoodness: white, hot, fury.}

and groceries to purchase….you get the idea.

I’m sure we all have days, weeks, months, or moments that are like that.

{Where is the pomp and circumstance, I ask you?}

In conclusion, I was feeling pretty bad for myself.

And then I got sick.

Really sick.

Like crying at the dinner table sick.

Super awkward.

For a good couple of days.

Anyway….

I’m all better.

{Thanks for asking.}

And it turns out, my life doesn’t stink.

Not one little bit.

Nothing like being at death’s door to remind me of that.

{Which sounds like an exaggeration, but let me assure you, I NEVER exaggerate.}

Plus, I’m pretty sure while Bryce was playing Mr. Mom, it was brought to his remembrance how awesome I am.

{Bonus.}

Katie

Post #364

I feel bad for this post.

It’ll just be an accumulation of the past four weeks of my life.

Probably with some bullets.

And some terrible photos.

That even editing won’t improve.

And random details.

Maybe an exclamation point to try and convince myself that last week didn’t entirely kick my bum.

Although, it did.

Let’s just say it’s a good thing Bryce got me some hot chocolate mix.

From Costco.

I think I have like 3# of it.

Maybe only 2# after last week…?

Does it really matter?

Let’s go with ‘no’.

{That’s what people say who’ve drowned their sorrows in liquid chocolate.}

We’re not dwelling.

Bennett ready for church.

And at the breakfast table.

And showing off his ‘healthy’ legs.

And in new pjs and his own sock monkey.

We bought this tractor for Spencer from a yard sale last summer and Adeline bought him a riot police helmet.

And I sold him on his turtle shell after I demonstrated that he could slide his sword behind his back.

And, yes, he has a black eye.  Due to a combination of a table, stool, slippery socks, and an open dishwasher, all while my back was turned. (!)

Meg

Adeline

Elizabeth

And the monkeys, with their stuffed animals.

Don’t worry, I know that sounded lame.

{I’m not that far gone…}

During the Christmas break we: {see? bullets as promised….}

• caroled to our neighbors.
• made and decorated sugar cookies.
• stayed at a local hotel with a 25ft water slide for New Year’s Eve.
• organized toys.
• went clearance clothes shopping.
• had a nacho party.
• did a family talent show which included but was not limited to: re-appearing ornaments, pulling a bunny out of a box, piano pieces, a choreographed dance number by Bryce and myself, the re-telling of the Christmas story with puppets, and according to Meg an ‘un-disappearing’ marker.
• watched the talent show over and over again.  (Thanks modern technology, proving I really have no rhythm.)
• saw Frozen.
• found Frozen soundtrack.
• sang with and fought over Frozen soundtrack.
• threatened to take away Frozen soundtrack.
• got my haircut.
• built 10 additional raised garden beds.

And now it’s January and a new year.

And I’m convinced I would be way better at goal setting and keeping if January landed some time in the summer, when it’s warm and sunny.

Katie

Out of curiosity, who is your favorite Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle?

Some Things Worth Mentioning:

• I got Meg and Spencer to help me clean the shower.

• Bennett turned 2 months old. {He’s days away from turning three months old, but whose counting…}

• We built some snowmen.  Bryce and I were on opposite teams to dress the kids the fastest.
• I won.  {Always worth mentioning…}

Spencer

Meg

Adeline

Elizabeth

• We decorated for Christmas.
• And fought about whose turn it was to put the star on the tree.

• My sister came to visit for five days before Thanksgiving and took like 1,000 pictures of our family.
• 15 of them turned out.

Bennett

Adeline

Elizabeth

Meg

 

• I finished the clothes for the girl’s Christmas presents.
• I was unrealistic about how fun that was going to be.
• They’re each getting a: robe, cape, shirt, and pants.

• My sister is talented enough to get a decent picture of me.

Katie

The Lies From The Voices Inside My Head:

• Move to Medford, they said.  It never snows there, they said.
• Get a Dutch Bros. hot chocolate, they said.  You won’t be addicted, they said.
• Make American Girl Doll outfits for Christmas, they said.  You can do it, they said.  Sleeves are just a word, they said; not a problem, they said.
• Make play dough for Meg and Spencer, they said.  It will only take a couple of minutes and they’ll play with it for hours, they said.  Not the opposite, they said.
• Get more chickens, they said.  You’ll find space, they said.
• Hide your Nutter Butters in the basement, they said.  They’ll be safe there, they said.
• Go ahead and start that book, they said.  You have self-discipline, they said.
• Have another baby, they said.  He’ll be as easy as the last one, they said.
• Buy those gray leggings, they said.  Bryce will like them, they said.
• Teach Elizabeth piano, they said.  She won’t feel compelled to play an entire song every.time.she.walks.by, they said.
• Let Spencer hold the roll of gift wrap at Wal-Mart, they said.  He would never use it as a sword, they said.
• Allow Elizabeth to make a marshmallow string garland, they said.  That won’t turn into a sticky, white mess, they said.
• Turn on the windshield wipers, they said.  There’s no way they would break if they were frozen to the windshield, they said.

Any lies from the voices inside your head?

Katie

I Really Wanted To Play….

that thing that was going around Facebook.

You know where you say random things about yourself?

It was super fun to read what everyone else had to say about themselves.

{And I love talking about myself…}

But the one person’s status I commented on, never gave me a number.

It’s a good thing I’m not a quitter….

So here’s some random things about me:

1. I never eat the last corner of my toast or sandwich.
2. When I was 13, I ‘bought’ a horse by shoveling horse poop for a guy down the street that bred horses.  Her name is Sable.  She still lives at my parent’s house.
3. I loathe my nose.  For real.  It’s pointy and round at the same time, the nostrils are enormous, and it’s weirdly large.
4. I blow dry my feet in the morning when it’s cold outside.
5. I jay walk.  All of the time.
6. When I was in college, I was a shameless dater.  I once had three dates in one day.  Another time I walked by this cute boy who had just received some change back from a purchase and told him that was the perfect amount of money to take a girl out for ice cream.
7. However, I also ended up dating this boy who was the son of a polygamist.
8. I was super shy, up until the 4th grade.
9. In kindergarten I was riding my bike home from school and turned to wave at one of my friends and slammed into a mailbox.
10. In high school, I rear-ended another car at a stoplight in my parent’s car that I was driving home from work because my sister had rolled our kid’s car and while my parent’s car was in the shop I borrowed a neighbor’s car for a date because the boy I was dating didn’t have a car because he and his sister had gotten T-boned by another car and while on the date I got hit by a truck damaging my neighbor’s car.  All in the same week.
11. I firmly believe that McDonald’s has the best French fries.
12. When I was a sophomore in high school I had both braces and glasses.  {Cruel, right?}  I had this really cranky, intimidating English teacher {Hi, Ms. Moore!} for my last period of the day. She let me throw a party the day I got my braces off.
13. The Count of Monte Cristo is one of my favorite books of all time.

Hope you’re having a good week,

Katie

It Occurred to Me Today….

that I haven’t left the house for like, four days.

Sad.

This is the consequence of unprotected {sex}, people.

You have been warned.

Anyway….

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My friend, in no uncertain terms, dubbed my baby ‘large’.

I may be tired, but I know an insult when I hear one.

So I told her, her baby’s so fat he puts the bum in Bumbo.

I’ve been potty training Spencer.  And he has done pretty well, if I do say so myself.

Tonight he told me had to go potty, even though he had a diaper on for bedtime.

{I may have strained my shoulder patting myself on the back.}

He and Meg are still playing together nicely.  Sometimes they come up with fun games, like racing around the house pushing each other in the wagon.

Did I say fun?

I totally meant loud, obnoxious, dangerous, and life-threatening.

Adeline loves Bennett.

In this picture she’s singing to him.

I got one Christmas present made.

A turtle shell for Spencer.

Either my kids are not as smart as I think they are or it looks nothing like a turtle shell,

because when I tried it on Meg and Spencer, they were completely oblivious to what it actually was.

Like, not even the slightest idea.

At least Spencer will be surprised??

And a quick note about Elizabeth, she’s in a community choir and she auditioned for and got a solo part for a performance!

Who knew? {Not anyone that’s ever heard me sing before, that’s for sure.}

Have a good weekend,

Katie

P.S. Feel free to leave ‘your baby’s so fat’ lines in the comments.  I may have a giveaway for the best one.  {If you’re not offended by the concept, that is.}

I Have Learned

• that even if I live in a state wherethesundon’tshine {no, but seriously, we won’t see the sun here for months in the winter} daylight savings still effects people.
• that it was d-u-m-b to try to start potty training Spencer the week of daylight savings.
• Meg and Spencer are the dream team to have at home.  Some mornings, it’s like I don’t even have to parent.  You know why?  Because they’re playing.  They’re not fighting, asking for treats, wanting to do a craft, begging to go to the store, or wondering when we’re going to have friends over.
• that just because your husband orders something from Dr. Adorable, that doesn’t mean it’s a gift for you.  It’s probably just liquid seaweed for the fruit trees.
• some days are easier than other days.
• eight year olds can throw tantrums.  Throwing pillows, sobbing on the couch, stomping around, slamming doors kind of tantrums.
• that I don’t get paid enough to field those kind of tantrums.
• that Adeline just adds an ‘e’ to the end of a word if she doesn’t think it looks right without one or just because.
• that Meg will take payment in chicken feathers for helping Adeline clean out her chicken coop. 
• apparently I’m over zealous in my reward system for Meg and will now be resorting to chicken feathers.
• Spencer can whack Bennett on the head with a toy broom, while I’m in the same room, just feet away.
• I feel like the world’s worst mother when those type of shenanigans are taking place.
• I am apt to eat two pieces of candy every time I walk by the Halloween bowl.
• that this house is pretty tiny when everyone’s home in the evening.
• that this house is pretty big when I have to clean it.

 

{Spencer with his tractor watching Dad on his.}

 

{Bennett had on a Halloween outfit with a little Frankenstein on the bum.}

{What the kitchen looks like while I’m making dinner.}

Katie