Dear Bryce,

I hope that you enjoyed your last trip to Home Depot by yourself, because it will be your last.

Is this an insane attempt to control your life by playing the victim? Yes, yes it is.

I would just like to recap what happened the last time you went to Home Depot by yourself.

I stayed home with all three girls. They were all in bed. You, in your naivety, thought all was under control.

Minutes after you left the premises, I was summoned by that all too familiar Adeline-sobbing-hysterically-over-'itcouldbeanything' sound.

I bring her down stairs.

I manage to decipher between the hiccups and tears that she has some how managed to lodge a very small wad of toilet paper way, way up her nose.

Now, Bryce, have you ever had to deal with something like this?

Probably not, because you were at Home Depot.

Now onto the confession...I am not a rookie mother. I know perfectly well that you're not actually supposed to try and get the object out for fear of pushing foreign object even further up small tunnel of a nose, if that were possible in this case.

But those doctors have never met a hysterical Adeline.

And I did try other means. I tried having her blow out the toilet paper. Did you know that Adeline thinks sniffing is the same as blowing? At least that's what she believes at 8pm at night when you're gone to Home Depot.

I laid Adeline down, found some tweezers and I pulled that sucker out of there.

I know that you're probably thinking after just such a circumstance I can handle anything when you're gone to Home Depot, but I would rather not test my limits.

Your adoring wife,

Katie